Taking the time and emotional effort to reach out to a former Castlewood Patient in crisis makes you a hero in our book! We think that it ends up being really beneficial for both parties.
Healing begins with connection and that's one of the main reasons this website exists. Thank you, Ann, we appreciate you so much! Read on below...
I so appreciate your bravery in reaching out to me. I too am so confused as to which memories I endured while being at Castlewood are true. I walked into Castlewood with an eating disorder and left with an eating disorder and a lot of trauma. It was horrific to listen to patients stories. My story/memories that I stated out loud were horrific and violent. My memories intensified daily with being drugged and doing IFS. Even looking back I feel that I received more therapy, more attention, more sympathy, and more excuse to engage in my eating disorder when my therapy sessions produced more horrifying details. I have no idea anymore what is true with my life, what really happened. I entered Castlewood with an eating disorder and a marijuana addiction. I left with an eating disorder and started an alcohol and pill addiction. I listened to many cult stories, multiple personalities, sexual abuse. The stories were horrific and traumatizing for all listening and reading.
My insurance had no problem paying which made it worse for me. The longer I stayed the more my stories intensified and my weight didn't change nor did my eating disorder behaviors. I did participate in Mark's sexual group and I was hypnotized by Lori. One of my roommates my first stay committed suicide and in less than 24 hours I had a new roommate. I have requested my records but, since it had been past 7 years they told me they have been destroyed however, they had no problem telling me the names of the staff that I worked with.
I am worried about your well being. I want to be here for you anyway that I can to help you. We cannot let our eating disorders win and we cannot let Mark and Lori win!
If you want to FaceTime/text/call/email, I am open to it all.
Again, I appreciate you reaching out to me. I am here for you!
With love, support and understanding,